So it's Wednesday today, and since Sunday the days have been fairly normal except a few things. I've managed to stay out of the sun so I don't feel so crazy when I walk outside. So that's good. I haven't been too tired to go swimming with Jake so that's good too, and he has figured out how to swim underwater!! of course in the water in a regular way, well that's another story. Some mornings when "we" wake up too early for mommy to function without and extra large coffee, Jake watches a show on my computer and I watch re runs of "Bones". It's not the greatest show to watch around a three year old, but yesterday, I did it. There was a mummy on the table and Bones was examining it and there was a hole in the torso above the heart. I didn't think much of it until Jake looked up from the computer and said "look Mommy the lady has a hurt in her chest just like you"....devastated...I didn't really know how much he has been hearing these days regarding my diagnosis, but obviously more than I thought. I haven't been keeping things a secret per se, but I've been careful to use language appropriate for a three year old, and until I am showing signs of my treatment, I'm not really explaining what's going on. But they hear stuff, and they can sense it. This morning at 430 am I woke up sore in my bones, the kind of sore that you feel when you've been in bed too long and your back feels screwed up. So I took my temperature (to make sure I didn't have a fever, as this is the first sign I'm getting an infection) and took some tylenol. But it didn't really go away, the deep ache is in my hips, lower back, pelvis and all the way up to about the middle of my ribs. It feels like all my joints are loose. I checked my booklet and the internet and they both say this is typical for neupogen treatment. yay. I was a cranky jerk all day. I"m not good at being gracious when I'm uncomfortable, it something I should work on I guess in my current state of life. I have a feeling I'm going to be more uncomfortable than comfortable for a while. The tylenol and advil aren't really working but I don't have anything stronger right now. The heating pad helps. I'm ok though..Jake and I are going to our friends cottage for four days of fun. I get pampered up there, good food, lots of distractions for the boy (which means I might actually get to read a book!!! or sleep!!!) and some much needed nature time. Can't wait. Until then. J.
3 comments:
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It's going to be some tough conversations I'm sure. But sick and working on getting better is something kids understand.
Take care and enjoy your cottage time.
I Love you.
meanwhile on the other side of Canada, I feel sick all the time worrying about my daughter and wishing somehow I could be there and be useful. If I try to talk to anyone about it, I just cry so I don't do that much. Loveing you Jeffie.
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