Wednesday, March 24
There are no words to express the relief I feel, having finally completed my Gantt chart!!LOL. I am bout to take my final exam in Project Management and then I am two days away from being free!! going with B on the train Tuesday to Hornby Island to visit a dear friend....can't wait.
Wednesday, March 17
Well, all these years I thought it could never happen to me again. I was in control tight, tight control. Letting only a little out at a time. Only letting out as much as I could handle at a time. No risks. No challenges. Safe. Choosing who, when , what. Now all of that is out the window. It overcame me like a swell in the ocean. One that looks small as it approaches and then takes you over and sweeps you out into the deep, with a smile on your face. LOVE. Not the fairy princess type of love, or the happily ever after. Real, gritty Love. When just looking at him gives you an adrenaline rush. Drinkin' wine at home into the wee hours, listening to all the music you forgot you owned. Watchin' all the movies you forgot you loved. Just being.
Tuesday, March 16
It's funny, I have spent 9 years actively trying to improve my life and get what I want/need out of it and I feel guilty for feeling that things are right. I have trouble telling people I am having a good life and that I am not too worried about things right now. you see I even qualify with a "right now". I am doing what I want to do with my life, I am with the man I want to be with and love. I am not starving, struggling or angry. Most days I can look in the mirror and be happy with what I see. It's going to be good.
Friday, March 12
Every so often I get obsessed about a subject and I have to learn everything there is to know about it. This has been going on for years in my brain and I have come to know it as something good, a desire to learn, a need to understand.My newest thing is this girl named Genie who was found in the early 70's in her family home confined to one room and tied to a potty chair. She had been there for 12 years. She couldn't talk. She could barley walk....there are sop many stories like this it makes my heart hurt. I was shocked at how many ....FeralChildren.com... I have decided to do portraits of some of these children, I am fascinated by them..their resilience, their pain.....
Wednesday, March 3
This is the last stretch of the semester and I decided to stay home today. Not to avoid anything but I needed to feel like I had some control over my time. To feel the freedom of not knowing what I am going to do today. The sun is shining bright, the cherry blossoms are frosted pink and white snowflakes drifting lazily over the pavement..my boy sits on the couch across form me and not 3,000 miles away. Life is good.